"DECEMBER BOYS" PART TWELVE: "NINETEEN, CLUMSY AND SHY" (2nd section)

NINETEEN, CLUMSY AND SHY
(2nd section)

     For the remainder of that first week, life inside of Fundamentals In Ethics continued upon its fascinating yet intense path. As with past semesters, Professor Scarfe ensured that the reading material remained dense in content if not mountainous in quantity. Rhett, with his astral brain eager to soak up new forms of pretzel logic ready to be studied, wound and unwound Moralists, Consequentialists, Egoists, Nihilists and Hedonists. Utilitarianism. Epicureanism. Altruistic Hedonism. All of this and more fit perfectly inside of Rhett’s wheelhouse as he read and at times, willingly re-red class assignments. For whatever inexplicable reasons, all of this arcane and definitely difficult material felt natural, as if he was reading an obscure language and yet was able to translate it to himself. However this is when he mused over the material solely to himself.

     For Rhett, all feels of arduousness purely existed within the classroom itself when Professor Scarfe’s meticulous knowledge cast an immense shadow, making it difficult to emerge and distinguish oneself positively. As with his classmates, the professor’s sneak attacks of calling on seemingly unsuspecting students remained a tremendous obstacle and soon became a source of frustration for Rhett. All of the concepts that made sense inside of his brain when reading the assignments at Uncle Denny’s, either outdoors in the yard or indoors with his head between the stereo speakers when he played his Uncle’s Traffic or Jefferson Airplane albums, all felt to phase into the ether when in the classroom. Professor Scarfe still rattled him and when called upon, it was as if language itself failed him, like his brain was on strike, determined to not send the correct information to Rhett’s mouth. When the information was indeed finally sent, the content emerged as gobbledygook. If only Rhett could just write papers and submit them silently, then Professor Scarfe would be able to easily see that not only is he grasping the content competently, that even the professor could spot a particularly strong astral brain at work. Philosophical brothers-in-arms or at least, Rhett could one day convince the man to compose a recommendation letter for grad school. But for now, he had to get through this class and he would not accomplish this feat through readings and the writing of papers alone. He had to learn how to think on his feet within a public forum. He had to find his voice for how else could he even conceptualize being a Philosophy professor if he was unable to address his instructor now? And for the remainder of June, Rhett’s difficulties began to feel increasingly daunting at best and discouraging at worst.

     And then, there was the matter of Ms. Lessing.

     Amethyst Lessing, whose first name Rhett would discover through a covert peek at Professor Scarfe’s class roster, only continued to mesmerize. Before each class officially began, Rhett anxiously awaited the sound of those rusty, dusty cowboy boots to aggressively march down the hallway into the classroom,, where he would then find himself lost in the sight of her striding across the room to plant herself in the very same seat she claimed on that first day. Amethyst Lessing was unquestionably a strikingly attractive young woman but the aura that surrounded her felt to be especially formidable, if not impenetrable. Rhett noticed, that unlike himself and other classmates, amethyst made no attempts to ingratiate herself to anyone. She always entered and exited the classroom alone and brusquely, she held no friendly conversations with anyone and when she did engage during class, she tended to come off as either brittle or combative. And so, everyone granted her a wide berth. But, Rhett could not help himself if he tried, for the sight and presence of Amethyst Lessing captivated him so.

     Under normal circumstances, Rhett would have avoided an individual as seemingly unapproachable as Amethyst but somehow, he surprisingly found himself drawn into her atmosphere. During class, he often caught himself stealing long glances at her as if she were a scientific curiosity that begged to be studied because honestly, did they really make people who looked like this?! Other times, he even found himself unable to look at her, for her beauty was so piercing that she seemed to not be designed for the eyes of mere mortals to withstand. Her hair was so thick and luxurious. The rich details of her face only continued to reveal themselves. And her figure…well…that was spectacular. I contrast, her expressions were so harsh and nearly one month into the course, Rhett was certain that he had never seen her smile or at least elicit a grin. Essentially, Amethyst Lessing was impossible to read, her veneer of perpetual malcontent notwithstanding. Rhett had no knowledge of where she came from in order to attend class and he furthermore had no idea at all of where she went after she left the room, with the sound of her rusty, dusty cowboy boots marching out of the door, down the hallway and down Bascom Hill. Did she have a summer job? Where did she live? What were her interests? None of those basic questions, and others like them, provided any discernable answers as Amethyst did not seem to have any friends—also the truth of which was unknown but it was all Rhett could even begin to assume, because whatever walls Amethyst created around herself felt to be ten feet thick as not one classmate approached her, let alone spoke to or with her. “Perhaps she’s just painfully shy,” Rhett wondered. “It’s clear that she is not going to make any moves in order to ingratiate herself to anyone else. So maybe, it’s up to someone else, specifically me, to make that first move.”

     Just as Professor Scarfe predicted to himself based upon semesters and years past, the students of his summer Ethics course, banded together to form a study group that congregated in Der Rathskeller. For Rhett, joining the group was a no-brainer as he knew that even a brain as astral as his would certainly not be so arrogantly foolish to refuse any input of understanding from his peers. And to meet at the Union—again, a no brainer. Since Amethyst was not a part of the group in any way, why not invite her to join, Rhett thought to himself. She leaves the classroom so quickly that she has never once been privy to any post-class discussions during which the study group was originally formed.

     Despite her impassable demeanor, Rhett hopefully began to muse that perhaps Amethyst Lessing was more approachable than she appeared. Maybe she was so uncomfortable in this class that maybe (again) she needed some solidarity, some friends…or just a friend. It was decided. Rhett Brazelton would muster the courage to ask Amethyst if she would be interested in joining the study group. No strings. Just putting it out there as an invitation as well as a possibility. His plan was to somehow excuse himself from class before her so he could speak to her outside—and preferably without the audience of his classmates. The possibility of at long last being able to speak to the girl who so supremely unearthed him filled Rhett with an intense anticipation. He actually began to feel a bit of an inner swagger along with his fleet of butterflies, so much so, he almost began to see the inevitable meeting as a sought out challenge. If anyone could melt the ice around Amethyst Lessing, it would, and only could be, Rhett Brazelton!

     At the end of June, just before the 4^th of July holiday break, the day arrived. Rhett rehearsed what he had planned to pitch to Amethyst countless times, therefore he knew what he wished to express fluently. If captured and tortured by nefarious evil-does, as if in an action thriller, never would he reveal to anyone else the contents of what he wished to say for it was too personal and private for others to discover. Besides, if he were to be successful, then wouldn’t he look as if he developed a certain magical touch in making contact with such an impossible figure?

     As always, Rhett’s inner radar sprung to attention at the first click-clack of the rusty, dusty cowboy boots, which entered the class carrying the remainder of Amethyst to her preferred perch at the far end of the room. Rhett was struck dumb even greater than before, partially due to his own elevating nervousness and mostly due to the fact that never had Amethyst Lessing ever appeared as heart stopping before this day. A long, flowing floral print skirt glided through the breeze, transfixing Rhett’ eyes which followed the skirt upwards to see Amethyst adorned with a linen over shirt that resembled a baseball jersey, which surreptitiously covered a low cut white tank top. She took her seat, removed her sunglasses and brushed a curl of hair out of her eyes and tucked it behind her ear as the rest of her glorious hair rested in a bundle on the top of her head like a crown. Once she placed her notebook readings and pen upon her desk reading herself for the demands of the next 75 minutes, Rhett remembered to exhale.

     Perhaps due to the impending holiday, Professor Scarfe seemed to be in an unusually languid mood as he recounted his own beginnings with Philosophy and ethics. It was a more informal day, and while the students appreciated this rare glimpse into the Professor’s personal life—like hearing a superhero’s origin story first hand—they also knew not to become too relaxed for one never knew precisely when or how one would be called upon. Yet, throughout it all, on this day, Rhett Brazelton stole one glance after another of Amethyst Lessing, hoping to burn the image onto the hard drive of his memory.

     Once Professor Scarfe officially dismissed the class and bid his students a safe holiday, Rhett, with back pack completely filled and closed, quietly bolted from the classroom to wait for Amethyst’s arrival outside on Bascom Hill. Outdoors, with a steady breeze that offered slight relief from the rising humidity, Rhett waited patiently while pretending to scour through his back pack for some missing or lost item. Thankfully, none of Rhett’s new friends stopped by to visit—either reading his silent messages to not approach today or they were all ready to begin their respective holiday breaks—moves all of which he appreciated in these highly anticipatory moments.

     Then she appeared.

     Amethyst Lessing stepped out of the School Of Education building and instantly squinted in the blinding sunlight. Just as she was about to place her sunglasses onto her face, she spotted Rhett kneeling by his back pack and rapidly marched in is direction. And Rhett noticed nervously, that she did not look as if she was approaching him in a friendly manner whatsoever. If he possessed the speed of Carl Lewis, he would’ve taken off right then.

     “Why do you keep looking at me?”

     Like an undercover spy unfortunately discovered at the crucial late point of an espionage film, Rhett Brazelton stood frozen when faced with Amethyst Lessing’s vehement confrontation, for that is exactly what this moment was. Rhett was caught and she faced him head on.

     In a perfect world, Rhett would have taken this moment and just have explained the truth. That Amethyst was undoubtedly the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in the entirety of his life and he only wished that he knew how to approach her to just ask her for a date or even to just share a drink and some popcorn at the Union, study group or not. But, in a perfect world we do not live in, therefore making the truth impossible to speak. So, what Rhett actually did say, and feebly at that, was the following: “Uh…um…you looked familiar and I…uh…just haven’t been able to…uh…place you…?”

     “I have never seen you before this class began, which means that there is nothing familiar about me whatsoever!”

     Oh, if she only knew, Rhett thought to himself, hoping to prove the fallacy of her statement but he remained quiet for fear she might publicly throttle him.

     Amethyst, with one final death ray blast from her eyes, exclaimed a definitive, “Now…STOP looking at me!” and then, turned upon her heel and marched down Bascom Hill leaving Rhett Brazelton thunderstruck and immobilized on a warm and humid summer’s midday at the end of June. 

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